Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
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I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
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The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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