What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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