At least make sure they are 18
Why
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
