now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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