I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i just google imaged poop.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
