census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
