Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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