So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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