She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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