The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Semen is not good for contacts.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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