The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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