Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize