i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
