Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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