i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
