her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
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let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
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It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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