so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
