i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize
