People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize