wakey wakey hands off snakey
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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