I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I am available for nakedness
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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