Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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