Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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