just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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