I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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