you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
