i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
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