If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
