Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
