Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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