if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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