i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I am naked and annoyed.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize