He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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