shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
we're making bets on your personal life
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
