Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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