So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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