They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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