I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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