so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.