Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
She needs sedatives and a leash
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize