So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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