you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
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He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
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apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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