She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
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