Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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