I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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