I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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