Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Is that strawberry winking at me??
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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