you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
