we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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