Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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