Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
