I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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